Volume 3 of the Bear Chronicles : BrewGuy

Bear has a few pints with XCL’s infamous BrewGuy and we learn about his upcoming album.

 

 

 : So, I finally get to chat with the infamous Brewguy. How are you doing this fine December morning?

  BrewGuy :  I am great, thanks, and it’s an honor to be able to chat with the equally infamous Bear, who I’ve heard so much  about.

 :  Why thanks!! Its not everyday dogs are able to talk so I welcome your praise. Now, I’m assuming Brewguy isn’t your  actual name? How are you known outside of XCL?

 : Well, whoever thinks you are an everyday dog probably has brain damage - but hey, enough about you. Outside of  XCL, I am known by many nicknames - D, Big D, Brewster, Brew….there was even a guy in high school who called me “Keg”.  But he was a jerk, really. But anyway, my official name is Daryl Geoffrey Brewer.

 : Call me crazy, but am I detecting some kind of “beer” theme here? I mean if I were know as “kibble” guy I think  people would get the point. So are you a beer lover then Brewguy, or just a lover?

 : I’d like to think both - While I do dearly love a frosty pint of the good stuff just as much as the next guy, I  try to be a lover instead of a fighter.

 : That’s a good thing. Sniffing butts is always preferable to chomping ass…but I DOGgress. How did you hear about this great little community known as XCL?

 : It was a dark and stormy night…and the wind was whistling through my hair….ok, not really, but I’ve always  wanted to start a story like that.  It was back in the days of Midtown Madness and Return to Castle Wolfenstein where I was  continually running into a fellow by the name of “Night Chicken”. He and other fellows would constantly be talking about “the board”.  So, one day, I finally had the sense to ask him what they were talking about, and he told me all about it. Shortly  thereafter I became a member of XCL, and the rest is history. He’s the Gamer Of The Year, and I’m…..well, not. But I have a nice smile.

 : I heard you were “WORST DRIVER EVER” in a videogame. Can you describe life as a gamer before XCL on Xbox live and  what its like now that you are in XCL?

 : I honestly never knew what a difference online gaming would make in my gaming. It was like going from VHS to DVD - I didn’t know how good gaming could be until I got Xbox Live, and then that was taken to the ultimate level with XCL.  If you told me a couple of years ago that I’d be involved with a group of guys as good as this, that would make such a major  difference in the enjoyment of gaming I have today, I wouldn’t have believed you.

 : Ya, for sure. My favorite part of XCL is when Jake uses the hosting money to buy me dog cookies..er..umm..I  mean…what have you enjoyed most about XCL so far..overall?

 : Hey, those are well-deserved cookies. It’s been a hard day’s night, and you’ve been working like a dog!  Hahahahaha….ok, that was horrible.

 :  I con-grrrr…

 : It’s hard to pinpoint one thing about XCL that I’ve enjoyed the most. If I had to narrow it to one thing, I’d have to say that it’s the knowledge that when I turn on my Xbox and get into a Live game, I KNOW I’m gonna have a great time with  the XCL’ers.  I don’t think every Xbox Live player has that same feeling - some are hoping not to run into 12-year-olds, and  others are….well, ARE 12-year-olds. But XCL makes that all go away.

 :  You are kind of known around XCL as the king of the “burns”. More specifically, if someone pisses you off or makes  some funny comment on the forums, they are often the victim of a hilarious yet thoughtful song about that person. For  instance, “Draegoth is a punk ass Bitch”, the “Jmac birthday” song. What inspires these hilarious clips of yours?

 : Well, it depends. Sometimes its something said on the board, or something said during a game, or even a simple  teabag at the right time - it just triggers an idea in my head, and I go to work.  I don’t really think of them as an “haaa,  in your face!” kind of thing really…well, maybe a LITTLE bit…but mostly I just like making everybody laugh while getting  a little bit of revenge at the same time.  Besides, since I know I’ll never be as good as many of the XCL’ers in most games,  I gotta get my licks in somehow.

 :  Trust me. They make people laugh. In fact, they make dogs pee on the floor. So I take it you have a musical  background? Is music more of a hobby or a passion for you?

 : I’m sure Jake will forgive you for that. I do have a musical background, I took piano lessons when I was younger,  but I found I didn’t enjoy them as much as I enjoyed just making stuff up in my head.  I remember when I was young, my  teacher told me to turn away from the piano, and tell me what note he was playing.  I got it right every time - I didn’t  really think anything of it. He told me that I had “perfect pitch” - apparently, this isn’t something everybody has.  As for  it being a hobby or a passion, I’d say a bit of both. I really enjoy playing, and I really enjoy making stuff that other  people enjoy. I really do get a kick out of hearing how much people enjoy something I’ve made. It definitely inspires me to 
make more - and I certainly plan to.

 :  Awesome. I cant wait for “Ode to bear’s Bitches who is a punk ass dog”….I once had the “perfect bitch” but then she moved out west. Do you have any other hobbies or interests outside of gaming or music, or are those the main ones?

 : Hahaha - yeah, those long-term relationships really screw the pooch, don’t they? As for other hobbies, I’m a  huuuge hockey fan - GO LEAFS! - but naturally I’m deprived of that right now thanks to the lockout. I’m a big movie fan as  well - in fact, I was once an extra in the movie “Children Of A Lesser God”, which was nominated for Best Picture that  year. although probably not due to my part, where I made a heartfelt reach for a bun on the table. I really wanted that bun,  man, and I was gonna GET it. I chose to retire my acting career after that, though - I figured it couldn’t get any better  than that.  So now I just watch movies - lots of ‘em. My brother and I will sometimes have full conversations using only lines from movies. People think we’re nuts…they’re probably right.

 :  HA! Jake worked as an extra in a few movies while he was at University. His clips include “X-men” (the guy in the  crowd with the black suit), and the football movie “Second String”. (bench player for the Buffalo bills). So if your current  line of work didn’t pan out perhaps the movies would be an option. By the way, what is your line of work?

 : Technically my title is “Interface Engineer”, but that just means Web Developer. I’ve been doing front-end  development, for, oh, close to 10 years now, I guess, ever since the news was asking what this whole “Internet” thing was  about.  It’s funny to see how far things have come on the ‘net in so long. I mean, just look at this interview! Look at XCL!  It’s all thanks to the Internet - God bless Al Gore for inventing it, eh?

 :  Actually, Old Yeller invented the internet but anyhow…. I guess technically my term is “enhanced canine ass  engineer”. I quite enjoy my job. I’m assuming you do as well? Rumor has it your company has an XBOX…in the office?!?!!?

 : I do indeed enjoy my job, especially now that I’m working on high-profile sites such as dodge.com - cheap plug, I  know. I remember working frantically on one piece because they were running a commercial for it that night during the last  episode of “Friends” - that was kind of a cool feeling.  But yes, we do indeed now have an Xbox! We have Halo 2, Burnout 3,  Top Spin, and Amped 2 at work, but sadly no Live connection. It’s a great way to take a 10 minute break, but don’t worry,  it’s not doing anything for my gaming skills…except I’m getting REALLY good at crashing into things.

 :  You can crash with the best of em I hear!! So If people wanted to find out more about Bear on the internet, they  could visit http://www3.sympatico.ca/j.reardon/bearpage.html .  Is there anywhere people could go for more BrewGuy info?

 : There is indeed - I keep a blog at http://www.brewguy.ca.  I really need to update more often. It’s a lot of fun,  and its great hearing from everybody who takes the time to read my latest blather about whatever’s on my so-called mind.

 :  Wow, that is a nice site. I’ll be sure to visit often as long as you visit mine. Now lets shift things a bit and talk about what’s really important….Gaming!!  How long have you been a gamer for??

 : Ever since the Atari 2600, which I got for Christmas. Rumour has it that my parents enjoyed it so much, that they  actually unwrapped it and played it on Christmas Eve for a while before wrapping it back up and giving it to me, so I guess  gaming’s in my blood!  How could a guy not get hooked with games like Space Invaders, Warlords, Video Olympics, and Yar’s  Revenge? Ever since that, I was jonesing for whatever games I could get my hands on. Vic 20, Intellivision, ColecoVision,  Commodore 64, Nintendo, Sega Genesis, SNES, Saturn, 3DO, you name it - I played it. Hell, I still own a Neo Geo system. The  games for those things can cost up to $300 each! Which reminds me, I really should sell mine and make some cash….anyway,  I’ve always loved it and I always will.

 :  If you had to pick a favorite genre of game, what would it be and why?

 : That’s a tough one, because I enjoy so many games from so many genres - but these days, I probably enjoy the more  fast-paced games, like Halo 2 and Burnout 3. Games which involve me blowing somebody up or hitting them with a car - y’know,  the things I’m good at.  I remember when I took a bunch of my games in to trade, the guy commented “Well, there’s really no  pattern HERE, is there?” I said “no, its kind of like all the zits on your face, they’re EVERYWHERE!”….ok, I didn’t say  that, but the dude did have a point - I’m pretty varied in my gaming.

 :  HAHA!! that’s Doglarious. Ok, lets talk Xbox and Xbox Live games then. What has been your Favorite Xbox Live game so far?

 : I’d have to say Halo 2. There’s just too much fun to be had in that game, and Bungie really did a brilliant job  with it. PGR2 was another beauty, as well as Midtown Madness. Wolfenstein is another classic that will never leave my  collection.  The Rainbow 6 series is also terrific. I guess almost any game that involves shooting or crashing into somebody  with a car, I’m all over it like a fat kid on a Smartie.

 :  Or like a dog on a dirty hippy. Can you name (without incriminating anyone) some of your favorite XCL’ers to game with? What do they bring to the table that you really like?

 : I have to say Fifty is my favorite, because we always get into each others faces, and we always have a fantastic time doing it. Especially in Halo 2. There’s nothing funnier than when we charge at each other, weapons blazing, both of us yelling at the top of our lungs until somebody dies…it’s always hilarious. DrJMac and Night Chicken are also two of my favorites, we always have a terrific time play with and against each other. It’s a guaranteed good time whenever they’re  aaround.  Insano is another favorite, because we’re always telling each other how dead we are to the other - we always have a  great time. Man, there really are so many. Kunz of course, Jellytot, all The Smurfs, your master Jake and Lauren - seriously, the list just goes on.  That’s what makes XCL so great - everybody is just a ton of fun to play with.

 :  CooL!! I agree. Now I’ve asked this to anyone I’ve interviewed so far, so can you just name a few “Classic” XCL  moments…things that happened that still stand out in your mind months later or that you can tell your grandchildren about.?

 : There are two that will always stand out in my mind. One was in Midtown Madness while playing with LX Xtreme  (another great gamer) and Chicken and bunch of others. I think it was the police game where you have to run away from those  who are cops, and LX was a cop and I was running away. I’d keep narrowing missing him, and for some reason I starting yelling “TO THE XTREME!” every time I missed.  It just kind snowballed from there - every time I yelled that, everybody would start  cracking up to the point I couldn’t even control my car anymore. It was great fun.  The other came in Wolfenstein with Kunz  and Glen - SameOl69, I think his gamertag is. We were getting annoyed at all the 12 year olds popping up with clans, so we  decided to form….the My Little Pony Clan!  We got into a game and we were in the basement protecting the documents, and we  changed our names to things like “Rainbow Pony” and we’d talk in high-pitched voices and say things like “we’re gonna save  the documents! yayyyyyy!” and we’d skip around the table and yell “yayyyyy, yayyyyyy!” every time we killed somebody. People  would come in the room and just be stunned into silence. Then other people on our team started joining in.  The site of 4 or  5 of us skipping around the table yelling “yayyyyyy!” in high-pitched voices was just too much - I think we all nearly died 
laughing. It was truly beautiful. There have been tons of memorable moments in XCL games since that, but those two will  always stick out in my head.

 :  Those are some great stories. Name one thing the people in XCL may not know about you?

 : …I forgot to mention before when you were talking about hobbies that I am a HUGE wrestling fan. I love it to  death. Every Monday, I’m glued to my set to watch RAW. I love it to death. Tremendous entertainment. Sure, it’s way over the  top, but that’s what I love about it. That, and I really respect the level of athletic ability that these guys have. They  never get enough credit for it. Their bodies absorb a lot of punishment every night and they’re on the road 250 days a year  doing this because they love to entertain - you gotta respect that.  It’s certainly not for everybody, and I can understand  why, but I absolutely love it. If you’ve never been to a live show, you should go - I GUARANTEE you’ll have a fantastic time.

 :  Hmmmm..a wrastlin’ fan eh? That gives me an idea. XCL is kind of like a stable of wrestlers. Instead of playing my  traditional XCL movie re-make game, I think today its time to introduce the XCLWF!!  The Xbox Canadian Live Wrestling  Federation. Sound good?

 : Excellent idea! Count me in!

 :  Lets start out with some classics then shall we….Hulk Hogan?

 :  Hmmm…a toughie, but I’d probably have to give that one to Fifty. Hogan is a massive superstar, just like Fifty  is - and Hogan is old, just like Fifty! HAAAA…ok, Fifty’s not that old, but he’d look good tearing off a red n’ yellow  T-shirt while saying his prayers and eating his vitamins.

 :  ok, Rick Flair?

 : WOOOO! I’d have to give that one to Chicken. Flair is considered the greatest of all time, and I think it’s safe  to say that Chicken is our best all-around gamer. He’s just flat-out great in every game he plays, just like Flair is great  in every match he’s had. If it’s true that to be The Man, you gotta beat The Man, than the man to beat is definitely our good buddy from Guelph.

 :  Brett Hart?

 : Let’s see….I’d have to give Fortitude the part of Bret Hart, who is the Excellence of Execution, and damned if I wasn’t executed a LOT by Fortitude, especially in Rainbow 6. He most definitely is the Sharpshooter.

 :  Nikolai Volkov?

 : DreamPro gets to be Nikolai Volkov by default. In fact, he should start every game out by singing the Russian  National Anthem. That’d be AWESOME. EVERYBODY would try to kill him then!

 :  The Macho man Randy Savage??

 : I think I’d give that one to Mr. Jameson. The Macho Man is always stylin’, just like Jameson is when he’s online. Everybody loves the Macho Man, ooooooh yeahhhh!

 :  Ravishing Rick Rude?

 : As for Ravishing Rick Rude, that would definately be NinjaRay. All the ladies love that guy - at least that’s what I hear!

 :  How about the Ultimate Warrior???

 : Ahhhh, The Warrior! I’d go with Captain Insano. The warrior was a madam, just like Insano is in Halo 2,  slaughtering everybody he sees. He doesn’t dance as much as the Warrior did, though, which is really too bad.

 :  Shawn Michaels?

 : Shawn Michaels I’d give to Wildside. Shawn Michaels was a Rocker. Wildside’s a Rocker. It’s a perfect fit.

 :  And the British Bulldog?

 : The British Bulldog would have to go to Adrenal. Adrenal has that huge Great Britain hat that we wore to the first XCL Pub Night. Its so big, he could have put the Bulldog’s mascot, Matilda, it there!

 :  Bobby the brain Heenan?

 : Bobby “The Brain” Heenan would have to be JMac. Heenan was hilarious, but he was always smart, and one of the most entertaining characters that wrestling has ever had. JMac fits that bill - he’s got mad gaming skills, and he’s a ton of fun  to play with.

 :  ok, now onto some modern grapplers…THE ROCK??!

 : Wow, that’s a tough one, but as THE MOST electrifying man in sports-entertainment, I’d have to go with Fifty  again. Just like The Rock, Fifty is ALWAYS entertaining when he’s talkin’ on his mic, and in a racing game, there are not  many better than him, if you smell what the Fifty’s cookin’

 :  Stone Cold Steve Austin?

 : I think your master Jaken Bear would also be a great “Stone Cold” Steve Austin. Doesn’t take crap from anybody, never backs  down from anybody on the board or online - that’s our buddy Jake. Most certainly a guy you want on YOUR side.

 :  Tajiri?

 : This one may seem a bit strange, but the role of Tajiri could best be played by Squid. Tajiri is a craftsman in  the ring - he is a master of making it look like he just destroyed his opponent, while in actuality, he doesn’t hurt them at  all. That’s craftsmanship.  The Squidster’s like that - he’s a very good gamer who doesn’t get a lot of credit for being so,  and he probably should. God knows he’s whipped my ass more than once.

 :  Carry on then…

 : Easymac would make a great Jim Cornette. In case you don’t know who he is, Jim Cornette was a manager for a long time in the WWF, and he’d always carry a tennis racquet around to hand to his guy, who would nail the other guy with it.  Cornette acted crazy, but he was smart. Easymac’s a crazy man in Halo 2, but he’s also good at it - a dangerous combination.

 :  The XCL smurfs?

 : The Smurfs would HAVE to be either The Four Horsemen or Evolution. The group within the group, they’re always together, always helping each other out, and after the fight is over, they’re always on the winning side. Many have tried to take The Smurfs down…few have succeeded.

 :  What about the Bushwackers?

 : Who else could be the Buckwhackers than Dylan and Krossroad? WHOAAAA, YAYYYYYY! When they first showed up, nobody  knew what to make of them, but they soon became the most beloved tag teams around. We kid Dylan and Krossroad and Apache a 
lot, but we all enjoy playing with them. They’d all be great Bushwhackers.

 :  Or just wackers in general…

 : My buddy Kunz would have to play the part of Razor Ramon. Razor was cocky, just like Kunz is to me online (all in fun of course), but everybody loved ‘em, and Kunz takes his time and picks his spot, just like Ramon did.

 :  That’s a good call on on Kunz there…

 : LX Extreme would, of course, play the part of Matt Hardy! TO THE XTREME! He would NOT play Jeff Hardy, because  Jeff Hardy is a mental case. Matt, however, is chock full of Mattitude, just like LX is.  And who else could play the part of Trish Stratus than Fifty…..er, I mean Lauren!  Trish is considered by many to be the best female wrestler WWE has ever had, and Lauren is by far the best female gamer I’ve ever played with. I’ve seen many a gamer underestimate her, only to pay for  it dearly verrrry quickly! And of course, she tag-teams with me to form Team Winner!

 :  I hear Team winner is still undefeated too!!

 : Nate should be Carlito Carribean Cool. Carlito is very smooth, very precise, and very clever. Just like Nate.

 :  Can you think of anyone in XCL who could portray hacksaw Jim Duggan?

 : Who else but BradofCanada!!… only with a Canadian flag instead of an American one. HOOOOOO! Everybody loved  Duggan, just like everybody loves Brad!  Diefuel would make a GREAT Iron Shiek. It is little known about the Shiek that he was quite a jokester backstage.  He would finish a match and say “that guy was awful, he can’t wrestle to save his life!”, and then that guy would come backstage and the Shiek would say “beautiful match, The Shiek loved it!” I can totally see Diefuel kidding around like that.  Plus, Die’s got the Soviet hat, which isn’t quite the same as the Iranian flag, but close enough.

 :  That’s a good group so far but we need a few to round out our stable.

 : Jellytot would be a good Eugene - no, not because he’s retarded!! Eugene is downright hilarious and makes  everybody smile when they see him - it’s always a fun time to play online with Jelly. He’s a very funny guy.  I’m trying to  think who TK421 could be, but I’m having trouble because all I can think about is Star Wars when I hear his name. “TK421, why aren’t you at your post?” So, I would make TK his own wrestler - The Stormtrooper!

 :  Wow! that’s a pretty impressive list of wrastlers..but these wrastlers will need a leader Brew guy..and that’s where  you come in. Who would you be.!!

 : Wow….it’s hard to pick out who I would be, but I’ll have to go with Mick Foley. Mick has a reputation for being  a really friendly guy, and I’d like to think I’m the same way. That, and I’d probably fall on barbed wire to entertain  people, just like he did….ok, who am I kidding, I could never do that, but I do very much enjoy entertaining people, and I  think Foley was the same way.

 :  Ok, actually, one last one. Who would I be?

 : You, my friend, would be a great Mean Gene Okerlund. Mene Gene was the best interviewer wrestling has ever seen, and you’d do him proud.

 :  I’m touched. That sounds like an amazing lineup. I think the XCLWF will go far. Thanks for playing. Now just a few more questions and you’ll be free to leave the dog house.

 : Certainly, fire away

 :  Are you a cat or a dog person?

 : oh, most definitely a dog person. Cats are OK, but I’m allergic.  And dogs are much more interactive with you.

 :  Damn straight we are! We’re also more interactive with ourselves if you know what I mean.  My Dream video game would be one where you have to drive around a hippy infested town and arrest drunk hippies. You play the part of the “Hippy Eradicator”, and the game doesn’t end until all hippies have been eliminated. What would your DREAM game be?

 : I think my dream game would be the perfect hockey game. One that plays and feels exactly like a game I’m watching on TV. I don’t think a video game will ever perfect hockey, there are too many subtle things that you can’t capture - like a long-powerplay in one zone, the crowd’s reaction to a big hit or save, or the buzz that the crowd gets right before a fight starts - the thrill you get when your team is trying to tie up a game with 20 seconds left - I wish I could experience all those things in a video game. ‘Cause that way, I could body check somebody, shoot, score, and chants of “BrewGuy! BrewGuy!” would erupt everywhere….ok, no they wouldn’t, but it’s a fun dream.

 :  That game sounds too good to be true! Speaking of hockey, what’s your take on this whole crappy NHL Lockout thing? Do you think they are being greedy?

 : I don’t know if they are or not, but what really bothers me is the lack of talking. In the off-season, they met once. Since then, they’ve met one other time. Why are these guys not locked in a room, trying to hammer things out? Why do both sides have to posture in the media?  I don’t think anybody really cares about taking sides anymore - they just want hockey back, and they want it right now - and I wish both sides would just stop yelling at each other and get it done. Hockey is suffering greatly because of this, especially in the US.

 :  I chase kitties for the love of the game, and those ass hockey players and owners should perhaps play or at least talk..for the love of the game..

 : I couldn’t agree more. I think the players have been a little more flexible than the owners lately with their last offer, but still, both sides have a long way to go. All we can do is hope they get it together.

 :  So last night I had the pleasure of experiencing some nice -30 temperatures. What are your plans for the holiday season?

 : My plans are to stay inside if it gets that cold again! I’ll spend Christmas with the family, and on Boxing Day we have a big family gathering on my mom’s side - she has 3 sisters and an uncle so it’s a pretty big family, and it’s always a great time. Other than that, I’ll put a log in the fireplace and get some serious gaming done, as I have the week after Christmas off. I’m really looking forward to that!

 :  that sounds great. Is there anything you’d like to say to XCL while we have the chance?

 : I’d like to thank everybody in XCL for making it such a great community, and I hope everybody has a terrific Christmas and an awesome New Year! Oh, and of course….TO THE XTREME!  And thank you, Bear, for the interview, this was great fun!

 :  It was my pleasure. Now when can we expect to see the Brewguy’s Greatest hits” album out in stores?

 : Well, I have to sign with K-Tel first so I can get a good infomercial to support the launch, but I promise that all XCL members will get advance copies!

 :  That sounds good. In fact, Ill see what I can dig up myself. Take care and thanks for being Bear’s latest victim!

 : My pleasure - tell your master to give you a T-Bone (and not a T-bag) for Christmas. Take care!

 :  Woof off :).

BrewGuy Kicks your ass     The JMAC Anthem

The JMAC Hilton               Punk Ass B*tch

 

 

 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS XCL